i love my blog. Honestly. I'm *definitely* by no means tryin' to look like i'm totally obsessed with myself. So not. I just feel, that this outlet is indeed an awesome place for me to express myself, and not bottle up everything till i explode. Newaes, do i care if anyone reads this, and am i concerned of how y'all take what i write? No. Living my life o'er the past quarter of a century, I am so way past bothering and being concerned with how others view me. Ok not way past, but working at it at least. Sucks, that amidst how harsh life can get sometimes, one still double loads oneself with concerns o'er the stupidest unbecoming matter of, Ooh how do others view me? Like, get a life.
The past 2 days, have been vexed for me. O'er papa's matters, which i shall not elaborate, and also o'er my bidding stuff. I absolutely CANNOT believe the absurdity of the bidding system. And how costly psych modules, and now thai too, can get. The fact of the matter is that, eventually, to graduate, i'll HAFTA take those psych modules afterall. So why make it so costly? Stooo-pid.
Ok i'm so not behaving like an woman of power for the hour, as i probably should. But, ah well that's why i need Jesus rite? I noe i ain't got it altogether, and likely would neva ever. He came, not only to redeem the world from sin etc etc; He came, too to save people like me from our seasonal occasional rantings o'er life's apparent morbidity. And, yes the victory is nigh. I know it is come. yet, because of this "I d-o-n-t s-e-e i-t N-O-W" mentality, a million voices yak, and yak, and yak in my head. The fundamentals of WHY, HOW, WHAT etc etc. Wateva. Go on and yak for all i care. The truth will still stand. I AM still VICTORIOUS.
Feel like just getting a pair of super high and pointy stilettos now. *shakes head*You wouldn't think i'm gonna wear 'em rite? Wear 'em and risk terribly injuring myself internally and externally, malu'ating myself front of the people that matter to me in a most indecent poise of walking, on top of 32945835943 other cons of it? NAH. Not prepared to do that in the nxt few yrs at least.
So then, what are they for now? Simple. To trample the antichrist underfoot with all my might! In my former days of taking physics, i did manage to get a concept that a smaller pressure point/area causes greater pressure. And so, the pointier the heel, the better.
See told ya i'd feel better after i let out here. And then in time to come, after i've seen the faithfulness of God in this matter, i'm just gonna review this entry and take a laugh at my own smallness. God is good, whether or not i feel it now.

Alrite. Tmr will be officially the last day i'd be working. Under adecco that is. Don't know if i made a right decision by telling Joanne tmr's assignment'd be my last one, but, i'm really honestly quite tired of working already. Feel that it is high time i took a break. As in one that's for real, rather than that which occurs only periodically, which i've undertaken so far. And trust me, that ain't breaks at all. A person does not take a break in the knowing that tomorrow's another day at work. Haha. Anyways, me stopping work shall by no means stop God's provisions for me! He loves me more than to make me slog for money! 'sides, i have my learning ladder. Not a lot, but good enough! :D
Okaes, shall keep this entry short and s-weet. Ciao.

Hah! I contradict myself ONCE AGAIN. Kept goin' on and on about how I totally do not want to work anymore, and the next thing u noe, Joanne calls and I'm like, Errmm ok i think i can make it. How greater a contradiction can i be? Oh well, it's the Monei! I've been so indecisive about choosing between goin' to Malacca, or goin' for my members' nite on 8th Aug. Partially because i'd really love to go for the nite, and of course also cuz of the M factor. I expect that i gotta use quite a deal of money on my books and material when school starts, plus i'm planning a trip overseas with my darlings at the end of the year, plus all the other miscellenous fees and expenditure (eg. shopping!) that may come along, AND THEN this malacca trip... Well i s'pose at the end of it, it really boils down to how keen i am in goin' on this trip. Need revelation. Hah.
Well anyways, whatever it is, God will prosper me. I did some reflections recently, and it just dawned on me, especially when Kelvin shared yesterday on how we as believers only oughta expect more good things and not curses to come when we're so tremendously blessed (TOTALLY related to my recent episode), that even during any trial that we might face, it really doesn't change the fact that God is good, and that we could rejoice in the trial. Christ has redeemed us from every curse of the law, and hence we stand on blessed ground. It really takes a true believer to say that he rejoices in his trial. Because that is definitely not how the world works. Even the bible tells us to glory in trial and tribulation. Very obviously it ain't because our God is sadistic or sthg rite?! It's simply cuz we can expect much greater grace to cover us thru the trial, and emerge out of it more strengthened, saying beyond a shadow o'er doubt, that MY GOD has delivered me out of the hands of my enemies.
I wouldn't say that this has totally sunk deep in my heart yet, but i'm learning. Day by day, i deem my life as a journey of learning, beholding Him as in a mirror, being transformed from glory to glory, with Him, and in Him! Praise Jesus!
Anyways, on a less serious note, i just wanna say, that whenever it comes to the alternate tuesdays, i gotta work extra hard (physically) on mondays and the other days of the week. Because those tuesday evenings are the times where i have great feasts. Like, seriously. Yesterday, we had a cuisine of mainly spicy food. There was, curry, laksa gravy, meesiam, yong tau foo, lucky plaza duck, wrapped chicken, few kinds of soup, yam kueh, english carrot cake, etc etc etc. I can't exactly remember all now. And on top of that, because it was uncle Tony's birthday, we had a super delicious Mango cake! It's sorta like the in-between of an ice cream cake, and a normal sponge cake. Really yummy.
Actually after my first slice of cake, my stomach signalled me that that was just enough. But my greedy mouth refused to give in, and my hands obediently submitted to its craving, reaching for the mouthwatering entity, cutting a slice delicately, and ooohhh savoring every nibble of the scrumptious cake. All this while, my stomach seemed to be begging me to stop. Haha paints a comical picture eh? Well but that was how i felt. At the end of it all, my mouth was feeling so fulfilled, but i was so bloated in the stomach. So much so that the not-so-nice feeling lasted me through the session, and even after that. Hah. The gluttonous nature of ms Pearlyn. And so, this brings home the point that, I gotta work EXTRA hard at attitudes now. haha.

ok, i have made a conclusion, that i can do nothing without Christ. haha. Yes, sometimes my brain takes a longer time than others to process information. hah! Ah well, for those who expect me to elaborate, i'll hafta apologise humbly *bows* and say, that it's just a general statement made in no reference to A particular event whatsoever which happened. Oh before i go on though, for those who've read my previous entries and are deeply concerned about how i am doing, i'd like to proudly announce, that i'm OK already! Yaay! Praise Jesus. Ya noe, just to side track, during every of the trials that i faced last week, now looking back at it, Christ was really just in EVERY situation. More often than not, whilst i am experiencing a trial or a stumble in my life, i tend to focus of the negativity of the matter, and overlook any hint of goodness in it. But looking back, whoa i could only say that God was faithful. Praise God!
Well, i sorta just returned home from my body combat class, where as usual, there was my eye candy haha. I do know, that if my dear Gwen is reading this entry, she'll definitely *pengz* haha. Ah well...
Well anyway, just now as i looked at him rite, I was just reminded so much of someone once dear to me. Not exactly his looks, though slight partial similarity, but more so his character. Hmmmm..................... it is kinda scary haha. But, well my instructor's much more attractive. haha.
Oh anyway, i so hope i'd be able to go for the members' nite on 8th Aug, though at the same time i wish to go Malacca. What a contradiction. Well i do expect that the party'd be nice. It's like how cool - I got an invitation card! yea i noe, cheap thrill. Oh well, it is good that cheap thrills entertain, for otherwise a person would certainly live an even less than meagre life.
Tomorrow! i'm replacing Sulin at learning ladder from 2-5. Hmmm i really like working there. I sooooo...oo love the kids. Kids, they really rock my world man! Today when i went over, I was so pleasantly surprised when shaughn remembered my name!-after seeing me for the first time last mon, and the second today. And boy did my heart just melt when he went,"Miss Pearlyn!" Shaughn is just such a lovely and intelligent boy. He uses English terms that i wouldn't have come close to using when i was his age. I really just have so much favour with the kids - Henry and Shaughn were kinda like vying for me just now, to an extent that it sorta became a problem for a while. haha. But i was really really happy.
Oh and before that, as in going over to learning ladder, pa accompanied me to adecco jurong west to hand in my timesheet. I was so tempted to try to claim back some cab fare caused by the wrong directions their staff gave me, but well i decided later that i'd give grace. haha. Well i did have a good time with pa though. I'd been so busy with work and stuff last wk, so much so that i really didn't spend quality time with him. So, today was a good catch-up so to speak. Haha i bumped into Jing at Jurong point. Both of us were like "Oh my God" haha. and then when she found out that i was out with my dad, she was more than mildly shocked i think. I guess it's normal la. As far as i know, most of my friends' dads are just ermm dads to 'em. So it's hard for them to understand and relate to the fact that my dad's my friend too! Praise Jesus for my wonderful papa. :D
Well yesterday was my first time serving at the main church ambs counter. It ain't THAT bad afterall la. I'm sure i'll find more grace and fun in the time to come! :D Oh and class outing was quite ok too. Was nice to see how everyone was doing. Somehow rite, i find that Zhehao's changed a lot. for the better i mean. He's now a Christian! But i'm pretty sure my change in opinion about him has nothing to do with the fact that i know he's a Christian. It's just, i s'pose the Christ factor in him that i see in all the awesome guys around me. Praise God la! :D
Anyways, i think i'd better end off this entry soon. Gettin abit too long i'd hafta say! But before that, i just wanna say that, the new mango collection is really nice! REALLY REALLY nice! But... REALLY REALLY ex too! it's really most worth to get during the sale la! Pity it's over. 'else i'd certainly go buy more!
~Me is greatly blessed, highly favoured, deeply loved by my Daddy~